**MK is part of the JG blogging team. Besides an insatiable passion for food, she also loves dragons and 12-year-old assassins. With that being said, here’s her take on the season finale of season 7.**
Well, it was time to see if the introduction of a zombie dragon was worth the one white walker they managed to snag during arguably the dumbest plan in all the Seven Kingdoms. Seeing all the characters we’ve been watching for years finally getting together on screen had me being my pants like a 2 year old that discovered bubbles. On top of my initial excitement, listening to the Hound and Brienne talk about Arya like proud divorced parents brought a tear to my eye. #childassassinsaerelife. Theirs wasn’t the only reunion that warmed my heart; we got to see classic Bronn and Tyrion banter again along with, a Clegane brother verbal show down.
After Euron came in too hot, as per usual, it was finally time for the adults to speak. The Hound had the job of zombie handler (rightly so after his little “oops” beyond the wall) at first, the zombie was being a little shy but once the hound kicked his box over he came out swinging. Everyone looked like they may have pooped a little except for Qybron whose weird ass was looking at a zombie hand like he discovered love finally. Even the threat of zombies can’t get Cersei to stop being butt hurt over team baephew (since our beloved Lord Snow can’t lie), so we had to watch in agony as Tyrion entered the lion’s den.
While Tyrion was trying to get Cersei to see reason, Jon was putting more moves on his Aunt. I think one of Jon Snow’s greatest powers is being the most logical character on all of GOT. A prime example of this is when Danny told Jon “the witch who murdered my husband” said she couldn’t have kids. Jon dropped a logic bomb “Well have you considered she might not have been a reliable source of information” …also, challenge accepted. Another classic baephew moment was interrupted by the pleasant surprise of Tyrion’s triumphant return.
It was foolish to believe that Cersei was actually being true to her word when she agreed to help the north but Jamie stayed hopeful. Over the past 7 seasons, I’ve started to love Jamie as a character but the pussy has blinded him. However, zombies have made him finally see the light! When he walked out on his bat shit crazy sister it was possibly the most “YOU GO GIRL” moment in all of GOT. Since we’re on the subject of pussies, let’s take a moment to discuss our favorite pussy Theon. HE GOT HIS BALLS BACK! (Well, in the metaphorical sense, but still YAY.)
Switching gears for a minute, we need to check in at Winterfell where the start girls have been giving us all anxiety. For the past 2 episodes I’ve been getting so mad at the 3 remaining Starks for fighting amongst themselves and listening to Little Finger. So when Arya walked into the great hall I was about to have a heart attack before Sansa said “How do you answer these charges…Lord Baelish.” FUCK YES! Out of all the people to take out Little Finger I am tickled that it was my favorite child murderer who slit his throat. Bran’s “all knowing” ass finally came in handy CAW CAW bitch.
Other than, the death of Little Finger, the finale also gave us another moment we’ve all been waiting for…. BAEPHEW GOT IT IN OWWWW OWWWW. Well I do admit it was awkward AF to hear Bran narrate how they’re related during their love.