News – “2018 Cereal Preview: Peach Cheerios, Lucky Charms Frosted Flakes, & Shreds (x2!)” – The future is now!

Scientists have apparently perfected time travel…but only a couple months into the future…and, uh, they apparently can only bring back cereal: not any lottery numbers, sports almanacs, or whatever cryptocurrency is most valuable at the time (CrunchCoin?).

Okay maybe not, but breakfast wormholes are the only logical explanation for how the wonderful fellas at MyCountyMarket got ahold of not I, not II, and not III, but IV (allegedly: none are confirmed) upcoming cereals from General Mills—cereals so exciting and new that I’m cancelling the New Year’s Resolutions I haven’t even made yet.*

Let’s take a gander at our soon-to-be-spooned pantry-stuffers, shall we?

*UPDATE: MyCountryMarket’s video has been removed for reasons unknown.

General Mills 2018 Lucky Charms Frosted Flakes Cereal Box

First up: Lucky Charms with Frosted Flakes (of corn), arguably the most fascinating one of the bunch.

It’s a calculated risk by Lucky Charms to ditch their iconic crispy oats—to anyone over the age of 14, the oats are just as appealing as the marshmallows, since after puberty, eating a swirling bowl of sweet iridescent marshmallows becomes more of a queasy than easy endeavor. And it’s even more risky to incur the wrath of Tony the Tiger. Though the GRRRanulated jungle cat doesn’t have exclusive rights to the phrase “Frosted Flakes,” his “…with Marshmallows” cereal is so similar to this that we might soon be seeing a breakfast aisle cat-fight.

Though I predict Lucky’s cereal will be tastier, I certainly wouldn’t bet on a leprechaun in a cage match against a tiger.

Yooooo!! Nah I needed those Lucky Charms Frosted Flakes like yesterday… alive.

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