News – “‘The Bachelorette’ Is Back, and So Is All of the Untouched Food” – An important running log of every romantic dinner not eaten on America’s favorite neverending televised fairy tale.

The reality-TV electoral college has spoken: Becca Kufrin is America’s next Bachelorette. After she endured an excruciating filmed breakup with Arie Luyendyk Jr., a race car driver with the emotional intelligence of a flat tire, the Bachelor franchise presented her with a sacrificial harem of 27 eligible men (plus one “social media participant”) for her trouble.

Over the next too-many weeks, these contestants will get something between buzzed and blackout at cocktail parties, grossly overuse the word “journey,” loiter in hot tubs that have seemingly appeared on location out of thin air, and maybe, just maybe, fall in love. But rest assured that they will hardly ever eat on camera, no matter how elaborate the romantic meals they’re served may be. The way to Bachelor Nation’s heart is through our collective stomach, but apparently there’s no reason to take a detour through the mouth.

Clay chicken

ACTUALLY EATING FOOD ALERT: Pro football player Clay hosts his family for a feast of fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and a tomato salad that he supposedly prepared himself. If we could shut this whole season down 15 minutes into episode one and have Becca marry this guy, I, for one, am fine with that.

I definitely always noticed that on these reality shows they’ll have the most elite meal in front of them and just take one bite and their done. I’d be going CRAZY on that food like Flava Flav did on his reality show!

Leave a Reply