That’s right….after years of calling girls basic and making fun of the pumpkin spice craze I finally caved and tried a Pumpkin Spice Latte a few weekends ago and now my whole world is flipped upside down. The sky is green, Ben Simmons can shoot a jumper, fish don’t swim upstream, the Eagles won a Super Bowl with a backup Quarterback that looks like Napoleon Dynamite ….wait that last one happened… still doesn’t seem real. No but for real that shit is delicious! After my first sip I basically turned into Samuel L. Jackson in Pulp Fiction.
I don’t know what the next step in this basic journey is, do I have to go out and buy a pair of black uggs, some leggings, a heavy scarf, a beanie and tell people how “I literally can’t even” now?!
I’m still trying to come to terms with all this but while I try to figure it out I just hope that the basic bitch conglomerate accepts my formal apology for all these years of slander and let’s me eventually attend the secret monthly meetings at Starbucks.